Mirror.

In that mirror, she saw her blemishes and imperfections. She saw the woman who use to get berated by him and was called ugly and made to feel unloved. The one who use to cry herself to sleep, but now doesn't even bother closing her eyes, because she can't risk seeing those moments play out again. In this mirror, she sees her strength and amazing attributes. She sees a woman who gets told constantly how wonderful and beautiful she truly is and shown through actions, what it feels like to be cared for. A woman who now smiles before she sleeps and dreams of being held again and kissed gently on the forehead. The one who can't wait to play out these moments again. While there is only one of us, there are many reflections we can see. Depending on the mirror, some might be fairly accurate and some might be extremely distorted. But no mirror will ever capture the full picture of who you are. Don't be beholden to an image from a broken mirror, look for a new one who sees you for what you are and won't try to taint your image, but simply celebrate it instead.

Forgiveness is the only option.

We often carry grudges and wish harm on our enemies.

When we’ve been wronged we only have two possible responses when it comes to those who have hurt us: we can offer forgiveness or we can choose to be bitter.

The thing is bitter people have every right to be angry. Whatever happened to you may have been catastrophic. Someone may have pretended to be someone they aren't, they may have physically or emotionally abused you, or perhaps cut you down with words that they won’t ever be able to take back. Maybe it didn’t seem like a big deal at first but the person who caused you the pain was someone you loved, trusted, and had given privileged access to your world.

There is worse pain than betrayal.

And it’s natural for us to seek revenge. We fight back. We won’t let anything stop us from inflicting pain on those who have dropped the emotional hammer on our soul. It’s the standard playground rule: if you hurt me, I’m going to hurt you. But that rarely gets you anywhere. You may gain a momentary relief but you’re going to eventually have to shoulder the weight of regret.

But what if we took another path? What if revenge wasn’t an option? What if we offered forgiveness to those who have treated us so poorly?

I can see you bowing up at the computer screen as we speak. Take a deep breath and wipe away every preconceived notion you had about that silly little word, forgiveness.

Just because you offer it doesn’t mean you’re denying that the act occurred or that you are diminishing how you felt when it happened. You aren't saying that it’s no big deal. You aren't enabling someone to continue on in the vicious cycle of hurting you. You're not sweeping things under the rug and covering up the crime that was committed against you. You aren't forgetting that it happened- that’s impossible. You're not even asking for reconciliation as it takes a commitment from both sides to kiss-and-make up.

But what we are doing is this: when you offer forgiveness, you’re removing the control that someone else has over you . As long as someone remains unforgiven, you’re granting them the right to loom large in your life by allowing him or her to maintain an emotional presence in your world. When you grant them release, you’re freeing yourself from them. While you’re carrying around this burden, you’re ensnared and in chains (and not the good kind).

It’s not an easy process. It could take an immeasurable amount of time to release someone from the wrong they have done to you. But you'll benefit in the end and your load will be a tad bit lighter.

"If we don't pursue forgiveness, the same wounds by which we are broken are wounds we will use to break others."

- Erwin McManus