She's just not into you!

Source : Google.com

 

Bad Girls are actually bad.

All these years I'd been complaining about girls and their mixed messages; now I saw they weren't mixed messages at all. I was the one that was mixed up.

You deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time.

Don't be flattered that she misses you. She should miss you. You're deeply missable. However, she's still the same person who just broke up with you. Remember, the only reason she can miss you is because she's choosing, every day, not to be with you.

Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your face(there are some who dont even do this), took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that she was no longer in need of your company.

She's not really saying she doesn't want to get married. She's saying she doesn't want to get married to you. She's just not that into you if she doesn't want to marry you. Love cures commitment phobia.

The word 'busy' in the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact, in every silo you uncover, all you're going to find is a girl who didn't care enough to call. Remember: None are never too busy to get what they want.

We're taught that in life, we should try to look on the bright side, to be optimistic. Not in this case. In this case, look on the dark side. Assume rejection first. Assume you're the rule, not the exception.

If a girl doesn't call you, she doesn't want to call you, a hard pill to swallow, i know.

How stupid is it that a one has to wait for a call anyway, right?

She's got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefis of a boyfriend, whom she can see or not see whenever she wants to.

Breaks. Hard, clean breaks, No talking, no seeing, no touching. . . . Keep your hands to yourself. The relationship is over.

Yes, breakups are painful, even from someone you may have only dated a few days. You may have been really excited about her and had a lot of hopes for the future. But how empowering to have the mental clarity to say, 'She just wasn't that into me.'

There's nothing worse than having no answer, in business, friendships, and especially romantic relationships. But the bad news is, no answer is your answer. She may not have written you a goodbye note, but her silence is a deafening 'see you later.

She's gone. Poof Vanished into thin air. Well, there's no mixed message here. She's made it clear that she's so not into you that she couldn't even bother to leave you a text message.

You have every right to know what is going on between you and someone you're knocking socks with. And the more confident you are that you deserve that (and much more), the more you'll be able to ask your big questions in a way that won't feel heavy and dramatic, I guarantee you.

If the girl you're dating doesn't seem to be completely into you, or you feel the need to start 'figuring her out,' please consider the glorious thought that she might just not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find someone that is.

I don't want to be 'sort of dating' someone. I don't want to be 'kinda hanging out' with someone. I don't want to spend a lot of energy suppressing all my feelings so I appear uninvolved. I want to be involved. I want to have future with someone I know I'll see again because they've already demonstrated to me that they're trustworthy and honorable--and into me.

*Change the gender and it applies to your life as well. 

One in Seven Billion

 

Source : Google.com

That's all I am. One lone soul out of nearly seven billion currently inhabiting this crazy planet. Whenever I think, speak or write, it is the thought, voice, and opinion of one person, out of seven billion.

In the infinite number of possible lives that could be lived, to form a perception of life and the human condition; to influence a moral code, values, ethics, and an understanding of right from wrong, Mine is but one.

And the great thing is; that if I write about an element of it, then out of seven billion people, it isn't unreasonable to think that anywhere between 50 to 3,000 people might find their way to this site, and relate with whatever I've written, enough to click a little button that says 'like' or leave an encouraging comment.

Now as encouraging as it might be that there are other people who connect to something I've written. It doesn't intrinsically make my opinion any more or less valuable or valid than anyone else's. And although some may agree, it is almost guaranteed that for every one person that relates to my thoughts, those same thoughts will seem foreign and possibly confronting to a hundred more.

Human are such diverse and abstract creatures, it's inevitable that ideas that will seem to make one person feel validated to their very core, will seem offensive and threatening to the very existence of the world view that others have created for themselves.

The first important thing to remember is, that we as humans have always made the mistake of thinking that people agreeing with us means we are right. So no matter how much we claim to like robust discourse, we tend to surround ourselves with people who agree with us and hold the same opinions and values as us.

But while we are living in our world thinking that the popularity of opinions has any bearing on reality; try and remember Galileo Galilei who spent the last 8 years of his life under house arrest for proposing that the sun did not revolve around the earth, and it was in fact the other way round.

The second and last important thing we need remembers is, that no matter how unique, profound, or important we think our opinions and values are; we are just one voice out of seven billion.  

Are You The Right Partner?

Source :Google.com

I have seen a question floating around lately that got me to thinking. The conclusion of it which was "Are you with the right partner". I thought it was a very interesting question, though in my personal opinion; not the right one.

I feel the question that people really need to ask themselves is not are you with the right partner, but are you the right partner? People often find themselves in a relationship with someone they feel doesn't entirely respect them or that abuses their trust or boundaries. They often end up in relationships where they are left feeling under appreciated, unwanted and insecure.


The truth is though folks, love and passion are not enough. You need to ask yourself, am I being the right partner for the sort of relationship I wish to have.


Do you want your partner to be more considerate of your wants and needs? Then you must make sure that those wants and needs are being expressed by YOU. If you are expressing your wants and needs and they are not being met, then you need to accept that this person may simply not be capable of fulfilling what it is that you need.


In order to be the right partner, you must first acknowledge your wants, your needs in a relationship. Your wants are the things you would like to have in a relationship, but that you can do without. Your needs are the must haves that you require in a relationship in order for it to be maintained. You must decide what these are and then ensure that even if your relationship does not necessarily meet all of your wants, that it meets all of your needs.


Then you must address what it is that your partner wants and needs from a relationship. What are there wants and how many of them are you capable of providing for? More importantly though, are you capable of providing for all of their needs? If you cannot provide for all of there wants, that is okay. Your relationship can survive that. If you cannot provide for all of their needs though, it is time to accept that this is a relationship that is never going to be able to work.


If you cannot provide for your partners needs or vice versa, then there will always be a feeling of being unfulfilled by one party or both. There will always be a feeling of not being "good enough" by the party who cannot provide for the other's need. When a situation like this arises, you must take a step back and ask yourself a very important question. Am I the right partner?


Are you the right partner for this specific person? If not, it doesn't mean that there is not love between you. It does not mean that your concern, compassion and care for one another is not genuine. It simply means that there is a need that the other person has, that you cannot meet. This is not a failure on anyone's part. It is a simply a difference in needs that cannot be ignored.


So before you ask yourself "Am I with the right partner" ask yourself Am I the right partner for this person? If your answer is no, you know what to do.

 

If You're Lucky Enough & Found Your Love Of Life, Hold Onto Her!

Source : Google.com

“If you’re ever lucky enough to find a girl who is a hopeless romantic with a naughty mind, you should hold onto her. Because she’ll be yours at two in the morning and at two in the afternoon the following day. She’ll kiss you where it hurts and until it hurts. And that’s important. Someone who not only knows how to turn you on but also knows how to treat you right is someone worth a little something… and a little more than usual.”

When I first saw this it said author unknown- The author is "Sionnach Bandia."

Beautifully stated Sionnach, and oh, so, true!

After reading the quote, I ponder upon it deeply, and thought to pen the way I see it. Thank you if you are reading my musing/thoughts & sharing your love with me.

For that's the girl you can share your good news with and she will rejoice with you. While being with the girl you can call at 3 in the morning if you just need to talk or a shoulder to lean on. When you have a bad day she will be there to hug you, sit with you and truly listen to what you need to get off your chest.

If your heart is breaking she is your safe harbour , she will stroke your brow, cradle you in her arms, kiss away your tears and wrap you in her love. She will work hard to fill your life with love, joy laughter and little surprises. She will be there when you need her.

She will give you her heart and trust you not to bruise it, however, even if you do bruise it she will forgive you and give you several chances before she gives up on you for she knows love is a gift and hates giving up on people. (I know this because it happened to me, true lover never give up on you, no matter what)

She will spend hours/days trying to find that perfect birthday gift for you. She will want to please you and will do everything in her power to make you happy and make life easier for you. She will even try to learn a few new things to spice up your life, if she thinks that will bring you joy. 





Spoil Your Partner

Source : Google.com

 

Spoil your partner (Sarcasm here). Do the little things that will make their day brighter. Think of the things that won't take much energy but will bring them a lot of joy. Then do them whenever you can.(No Sarcasm here)

Pick up milk on the way home. Set a glass of water on the nightstand. Send a text message just to say hello. Have a plan for dinner. Send flowers to work. Wake up them with a kiss if you are maaried or Wake up them with Good Morning text if you are dating. Write a note inside the card instead of just signing it. Pick up a new book from a favorite author. Buy a new snack you think they'll like. Leave 'I love you' in an unexpected place.

You have chosen a partner, someone with whom to share your present, to hold your hand as you go through life. A fully-formed, grownup person is standing next to you. Don't worry that you might ruin them if you're too nice. If they act like a jackass when you're extra nice, then they're just a jackass. Don't choose a jackass for a partner.

The one thing I always notice in conversations with happy, old couples who've been together for considerably longer than I've been alive is that each person always thinks their partner is the one who does more and gives more. Why is that? Because both people are doing their best to make the other feel spoiled, to fill the other's day with sunshine, to express love with action. It's a reinforcing cycle, a feedback loop.

Do the little things that show you care. That's your companion through life; help make them well- equipped and cheerful for the journey.

Those little expressions of love build and help to maintain a strong and deep relationship that can, given time, last not only any challenge, but a lifetime.

Special Reference to a Man (who follow me on Twitter and is from New York, USA) quoted me "I read this as I'm about to make a trip across town (15miles) to drop off my wife's lunch which she forgot this am;She hasn't asked, I choose to and that is why we have been together 20 yrs." That is quite special expression of love and I thought to share with you all.

'Action speaks louder than words', we all read it in our KG. Expressing love to special people of our lives gives immense pleasure that could be felt in doing anything. It's a two-way street. Everyone wants to know they are special to their partner.

"That’s how kindness works too: there’s a great deal of evidence showing the more someone receives or witnesses kindness, the more they will be kind themselves, which leads to upward spirals of love and generosity in a relationship."

This is my goal every day. To make her the happiest Girl I know!

Be the change, Stop Complaining About the Community

Source : Google.com

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

Eh, so much drama and complaining about people and the community. Look you choose the people you surround yourself with. You choose the part of community that you want to be a part of. If you don't like it, CHANGE IT. Sitting on your asses and complaining doesn't do anyone any good. Getting OFF your asses and doing a little hard work will prove much more productive and your life much happier. It isn't easy. It WILL cost you in many forms.

If you are happy wallowing in your negative life and bitching up a storm then do it in a mirror and not to everyone else. We don't need you feeding that crap into the positive and good that so many have worked hard to create for themselves and others.

COMMUNITY, we have it for SUPPORT. We have it for SAFETY. We have it because those who love the lifestyle worked their asses off to BE THE CHANGE. Is it perfect NO, will it ever be, NO. But if you truly want to be a part of something incredible it is out there to be found!!!! LOOK past the weak and shallow, find the people & groups who are true to the lifestyle that want to see you grow and become another grand part of all the good things happening.

BE THE CHANGE THAT YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD.

Depression lies to you! (Experience of Life)

Source : Google.com

Date : 23/12/13
Place : While travelling From Jodhpur to Jaipur

I'm back in a place I thought I was done with -- battling depression. I have a lot more hope this time though. I know it ends, and I'm not a teenager with hormones. I'm also not in an abusive relationship. So, you know, way better equipped to handle it this time around.

It's been a while since I've been here, though, so I'm having to relearn some things. Get my bearings, as it were. This is what I have to keep telling myself:

Depression lies.

Depression is like the evil adviser to my brain. It's the Grima Wormtongue to my Théoden, is what I'm saying.

It sits there and feeds you lies and shit and manipulates you. And you trust it, because it's coming from a place you're used to trusting. It's careful to feed you lies that seem somewhat plausible. If you were to say them out loud, everyone would recognize that you've got a liar in there, but when it's just inside your head, depression can repeat it and magnify it and make it seem true and real.

Case in point? This morning depression whispered "No one actually likes you. You're a failure, a creep, a socially awkward idiot who tries too hard to make people like you. They pretend, and they pretend well, but it's not true. They actually think you're rather sad, and talk about you all the time when you're not there."

And I went "Yeah, that seems reasonable" and decided not to get out of bed.

But depression slips up sometimes. Sometimes it tries to convince you of something that you know cannot be true.

This morning depression whispered that no one liked me and that I was a failure. But THEN it whispered "Your Best Friend hates you too. Also you are shit at Economics."

And I went wait a second.  

My Best friend doesn't hate me. I know she's rather fond of me. And I'm quite good at economics, thank you very much. It's my one bankable talent. My High School teacher taught me the subject pretty well.

Depression had lied and won, but then it lied some more and I recognized it for what it was. I got out of bed. I brushed my teeth. I even ate food.

This doesn't mean I don't believe it sometimes. I mean, I'm having to work pretty hard today to remind myself that the first part depression told me isn't true. I'm writing this instead of being productive because depression has me half- convinced that there is no point to actually trying at things.

But if I remember that depression lies, I have a better chance of fighting it. I can anticipate it's bullshit faster, make battle plans that are more efficient.

And eventually, like Théoden, I'll exile my evil adviser. I probably won't offer it food and shelter during a hobbit uprising, though. I'm not Frodo.

Be kind to yourself and don't let the liar win.